Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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