This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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