These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
