I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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