You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
