thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize