i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
