So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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