There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
