i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
