Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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