Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
