At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
