Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Randomize
