Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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