So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
