my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
