Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
The feeling are messing with the penis
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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