I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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