I'm going to jail i love you
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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