At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
