I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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