He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Green mimosas i think yes
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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