Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I got inside last night via doggy door
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
