his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize