were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
