Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize