Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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