I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
