im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
