he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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