if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
