We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
