I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
