Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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