i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
