just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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