she looked like the bat from fern gully.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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