turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
