Pappa wants mamma naked
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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