I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
