just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Randomize
