i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
