Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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