Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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