wake up i wanna do it froggy style
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
