Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
