he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
