i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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