I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
